These restaurants were hunted down ferociously by the tribe and all rate in our highest value category; 5 out of 5 claymores. If you only have time for a few, I’d suggest the top three.
All addresses are given as some locations aren’t the same quality. I’ve left In and Out burger off the list because it’s an LA gimme.
The Best Fish Tacos in Ensenada. *
http://www.bestfishtacoinensenada.com/
1650 Hillhurst Ave
Los Angeles CA 90027
You must have these tacos. Sessi’s mango salsa is brilliant with a little Mexican cream. There is a liquor store at the end of the block and Joseph, the owner, will let you bring in your own beer. If you go to one place to eat, this is it hands down. The tribe has spoken.
East India Grill*
http://www.eastindiagrillla.com/mobile.html
345 N La Brea Ave
Los Angeles CA 90036
Simply the best fucking curry on the planet. Period. They are from the Punjab region of India so they are the next door neighbors of Pakistan. Which is why their food is spicy and tasteful unlike most blah Indian food.
Daikokuya*
http://www.daikoku-ten.com/locations/littletokyo/
327 E 1st St
Los Angeles CA 90012
I never thought waiting an hour for a bowl of ramen would be worth it. In fact, I bitched at my friend the whole hour we waited for a booth. After we sat down and I got my food, I took one bite an apologized stating I would never complain again about the wait. Magical.
The rest are in no order but all worth checking out.
Poquito Mas
http://www.poquitomas.com/
3701 Cahuenga Blvd #1 CA 91604
Everything there is great. The Chile Pasilla Plate is my favorite. This particular Mas has the best food, and you will see the odd celebrity here and there working over at Universal studios. I saw Keifer Sutherland, he got a burrito and interrogated a terrorist in the back. Also it’s across the street from In and Out burger and a block from Vivid Videos. Location, location, location.
Hot Wok
4840 Lankershim Blvd CA 91601
No website. Tiny hole in the wall place run by a strange Vietnamese man named Qwuan. Our favorite local character, we ate there at least one a week. He insisted we stay to watch Judge Judy with him. This man is a riot. His chicken lo mien is made from scratch everyday and is awesome. Warning: do not order anything but chicken and seafood menu items. Whatever this man does to beef and pork is unholy.
Vicious Dogs
http://www.viciousdogsnoho.com/
5231 Lankershim Blvd CA 91601
Just down the street from Hot Wok. I know most Angelenos will tell you “go to Pink’s” but fuck that. The line is too long, the food is overrated, and this place is better. The owner Willie will practically hug you as you enter and what he does with a hotdog is beyond words. He is always making something crazy like his thanksgiving dog: turkey dog with stuffing, gravy, and cranberry relish. I hate hotdogs and I ate here at least once a week.
Ernie’s
http://www.erniesnoho.com/
4410 Lankershim Blvd
North Hollywood CA 91602
The last of the Lankershim trinity. This hidden gem of the Valley is everything a Mexican restaurant should be. Giant drinks, mariachis on the weekends, and a great poorly lit atmosphere. I always get #47b and I recommend you do as well. Write it down.
El Compadre
http://elcompadrerestaurant.com/
7408 Sunset Blvd
West Hollywood, CA 90046
Home of the Flaming Margerita. This is the only place in LA for authentic Tex-Mex. Across the street from Guitar Center, it is a hangout for LA rock stars. Billy Gibbons from ZZ Top is usually haunting the back booth if he’s in town. I can’t think of a more ringing endorsement for your Mexican restaurant than BFG.
Fat Burger
http://www.fatburger.com/
10600 Ventura Blvd
Los Angeles CA 91604
Across the street from Poquito Mas this is another staple LA burger joint. Made famous by rapper Ice Cube it has been a haunt of musicians for decades. Always get the fat fries with your fat burger. Always.
Fish Grill
http://www.fishgrill.com/
7226 Beverly Blvd
Los Angeles CA 90036
Run by Israelis and strictly kosher it is an awesome place to get your fish on. The red snapper is perfect and their fries are incredible. Plenty of celebrity sightings as well but be careful Cuba Gooding JR doesn’t hit you in the ass with the door like he did me.
Taste Chicago
603 N Hollywood Way
Burbank CA 91505
Owned by actor Joe Mantegna, a Chicago native. He claimed he couldn’t find a decent Chicago deep dish pizza in LA so he just opened his own shop! A traditional deep dish will run you just under $30 bucks, it will take a full half hour to cook, and you will eat every damn piece of this thing! Worth. Every. Penny.
Flooky’s
http://www.myflookys.com/
21034 Victory Blvd
Woodland Hills CA 91367
This one is deep in the valley but worth the trip. The menu board is forty feet long with another two gigantic boards of daily specials. If you can’t find something to eat at Flooky’s, you aren’t fucking hungry. Go home.
Taylor’s
http://taylorssteakhouse.com/
3361 West 8th St.,
Los Angeles, CA 90005
Meat Boner. Walking into Taylor’s is like the 1970s and Raymond Chandler shit the most perfect restaurant since Goodfellows. Dark stained wood. Deep ox blood red leather booths. Specialty steaks. In a city of Class Four Vegans, stating they will never eat any vegetable that casts a shadow, Taylor’s is a forbidden treasure.
They have the rarely served anymore Culotte. It is a cut of steak that some carnivores most revere. Very few steaks can be cut from the top cap making this steak the filet mignon of the sirloin. Best marinated and a bit toothsome, the Culotte cut can only be harvested, two small diamond shaped pieces at a time, per cow.
Everything at Taylor’s is meattastic with a swanky Continental Detective vibe. This is the kind of place you want extra butter, sour cream, and bacon bits on that baked potato.
Go into this place to lay low, drink bourbon, and crush cow.
Neptunes Net
http://neptunesnet.com/
42505 Pacific Coast Hwy
Malibu CA 90265
Last but not least is Neptune’s Net. It’s a long but beautiful drive along the PCH. Filled with an eclectic mix of bikers, surfers, and brave tourists this place was featured is the first Fast and Furious, and Iron Man three. Incredible ocean view and fantastic seafood await. The restaurant is divided into two halves as you enter. Fried and Steamed. Leave the fried side for the amateurs and head into the steamed section for the best damn ceviche you will ever have. This was a once a month trip for the tribe.
So there you have it. This is my personal gastronomic tour of Los Angeles. There is plenty of good eats in town but these are my own personal gems that are a must whenever I’m in LA.
So says Boses.
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